


Ink and Feathers

by Skarias



Series: Andraste's Grace [5]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Tattoo Parlor, F/F, Fluff, Romance, Tattoo Artist!Mahariel, University Teacher!Leliana
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-30
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-07-20 18:30:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 17,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16143020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skarias/pseuds/Skarias
Summary: Sarah Mahariel owns 'The Grey Warden', a tattoo parlor in the metropolis Denerim, she also pretends not to laugh at Alistairs jokes, but don't tell her you know that.Leliana Leroux teaches music and art at Denerim University, finally decides to get the tattoo she always wanted and really dislikes autumn.orHow a tattoo turned into a lot more than Leliana bargained for.





	1. Autumn

 

_Leliana_

 

Leliana was not having a good day.

There were, of course, many reasons to why this particulary day just wasn't that great. A few hours ago, for example, she believed that the worst thing that would happen to her today was the alarm clock sitting on her bedside table springing to life and most likely waking up half the neighborhood. In the end she won the battle against the infernal machine, the technique of blindly-swatting-in-the-direction-of-the-sound-until-it-finally-stopped triumphing over the malevolent device once again.

It only went downhill from there.

One should mention at this point that Leliana was a summer person. There was, of course, nothing wrong with the other three inferior seasons, besides the fact that their respective climate was either far too cold or far too rainy for her taste, but summer had always held a special place in her heart. The soggy mess of differently coloured leaves, shades of red and bright yellow blending together with the greyish, wet concrete beneath her feet, were an ever present reminded of the fact that autumn was here to stay.

Maker, did she hate autumn.

It wasn't the fact that the trees all around her slowly began to die or that their foliage clustered the streets wherever she looked, no. Part of Leliana's job was to be able to appreciate the scenic beauty of settings such as those of the melancholic season, after all. The real problem she had with autumn was the unbearable weather.

Denerim was a city known for many things, being the capital of Ferelden it was home of not only the royal palace that once housed the family of kings and queens of the past, but also of the Ferelden President that had been reelected not too long ago. That was what most people not living in the massive metropolis knew of Denerim, anyway. The inhabitants of the city associated their city with one thing and one thing alone. Rain.

A day in spring or fall in which it didn't rain in Denerim was a day you would look up to the sky and wonder if something was broken, if maybe they had taken a day off for maintencance and had simply forgotten to tell the people down below. But even the rain never really bothered Leliana, after all it could be quiet relaxing lounging in the comfortable armchair in the house she shared with her best friend, her gaze traveling idly over the pages of a good book and the only sound that filled the room being the distinctive thrum of rain against the glass windows. Rain really only became a problem once her car broke down.

At first she hadn't thought much of it, the University they both worked at was all but a few minutes away anyway and walking to work would do her good, not to mention the speech she had received from Josephine about all the pollution that wouldn't end up in the air or the money they could save by not spending it on gas. The Antivan's opinion had changed rather rapidly once she had arrived at their home completely soaked through only a few days after the incident. Leliana had called the mechanic the day after, the man on the phone having told her that it would take up to next Monday until the necessary parts arrived to make the repairs.

If she never saw rain again it would be too soon.

The rain had long soaked through the hood of her jacket, dripping wet strains of red hair sticking to her temple and obscuring her vision as she tried to wiggle her way past the masses of people on the busy streets of Denerim that seemingly didn't pay any mind to the bucketloads of water that threatened to wash them away.

Of course her destination had to be on the other end of the city, too, because why wouldn't it. 'The Grey Warden', coming highly recommended to her was situated along the Drakon River, the body of water that seperated the Market District from the poorer part of the city that the people had come to nickname 'The Alienage'.

At least the tattoo parlor was easy enough to find, the bright blue neon sign sporting 'Grey Warden' in a broad font next to an equally lit griffon sprang into view as soon as she crossed the next corner. She jumped and cursed under her breath as she barely managed to dodge a bombardment of water as one of the many cars that whizzed through the dense network of streets drove through a pool of rainwater that had gathered itself on the concrete road next to her. Coming closer she could make out differently coloured designs in every imaginable shape and in different sizes being displayed along the broad beam of glass that allowed passersby to look into the building.

The soft sound of a bell rang through the store as Leliana opened the transparent door, looking around the, thankfully heated, room she found herself alone in the shop. Pulling her hood back she ran one hand through her hair, frowning once she felt just how soaked her hair was as could hear the water drip to the polished floor beneath her feet.

"Be with you in a second!" she heard a voice call out from behind a closed door behind the counter towards the back of the circular room.

Letting her gaze wander over the various posters and paintings that clustered the walls, the scattered sofas and tables around the studio and other pieces of furniture, Leliana quickly found herself drawn to an open book lying discarded on one of the unoccupied leather chairs.

Lifting the heavy book and drawing it nearer, the rough casing scraping against her hands as she did so, she glanced over the various drawn designs sprinkled over the various pages, careful to remember the number in case that page had been opened for a reason. It didn't take long for her to find something that caused her to stop skim through the book.

The hand drawn sketch that took up almost half of the page depicted a majestic griffon, wings and claws outstretched and it's design reminding the redhead of that of the neon form challenging the rain outside. She jumped slightly at the creaking sound of a door opening, causing the book in her hands to drop close and the sound to reverberate in the room.

Scrambling through the pages, the number she had known just a second ago now gone from her mind she finally gave up on finding the correct page and dropped the book back onto the chair. Looking up and reverting her attention to the door she had spotted earlier, she found an elf watching her in silent amusement, an curious eyebrow lifted ever so slightly.

Said woman was currently fumbling with both hands behind her head, struggling to wrap her dark hair in a loose bun behind her head and keep it place out of her face. She mumbled something that could have been a 'hello' through the pen stuck between her teeth, Leliana couldn't be sure. Her attention stuck on the tattoos and features of her face, it was her own fault really, she had no business looking as cute as she did while resembling a dishelved mess. Her lips twitched up in a smile once she spotted the book that she likely remembered not to have left like that in the studio.

Pinning the pen behind her ear and winning the fight against her mane of hair the elf fished a small notebook out of the pockets of her coat and flicked through it.

"Miss...Leroux?" she asked, butchering her Orlesian surname like most people did in these regions, Leliana had lived in Ferelden long enough to have stopped caring about little things like these and just nodded.

"Just Leliana is fine."

"Well Leliana, I'm Sarah, nice to meet you." she introduced herself, offering her hand in greeting and looking her over, "You might want to get out of these clothes, however." the elf continued, a moment passed before the implications of what she said hit her and she began to blush a furious shade of scarlet, "To dry off, I mean!" she added quickly, guesturing to the door she just came out of, "Up the staircase to the left is a bathroom, if you continue to drip all over the floor Alistair will kill me."

It was Leliana's turn to be embarassed, looking behind her she could still make out the trail of wet puddles along the floor she had left when she first entered the tattoo parlor, "I should do that, shouldn't I? Thank you." she replied, dropping the bag she carried slung around her hip next to the sketchbook and making for the door that led out of the room that suddenly became way too warm for her liking.

Climbing the spiral staircase, doing her best to regain some of her composure, she soon found herself in a wide living room that led into a slim corridor to her left. The contrast of these rooms to the wide open space downstairs was almost surreal.

While the studio below was colourful and inviting, most of the furniture up here looked as bare-bones as it got. Walls that looked like they were supposed to display a wide array of brightly coloured paintings or photos of family and friends were left empty. The few pieces of furniture, mostly consisting of a sofa and a glass table did nothing to lighten up the room.

Turning to head towards the corridor she cought sight of something that didn't quiet fit in with the rest of the room, a small frame depicting two children. If Leliana guessed she would say that the girl could have been Sarah, she wondered why it was the only picture she seemed to have displayed.

Reminding herself that it really wasn't her business and that she shouldn't snoop around other people's homes she quickly found the room the tattoo artist was referring to and let herself in. Closing the door behind her she sacked against the wooden frame and closed her eyes for a brief moment before scanning the compact bathroom for a towel.

Slipping out of her jacket that she wouldn't be able to dry off even if she tried, Leliana toweled off her hair and tried to get most of the rain out of her jeans and tank top before she opened the door to head downstairs again.

"Hey, have you seen the designs for next week's-" a man with tousled blonde her all but ran into her before taking two steps backwards and realizing his mistake, "you're not Sarah."

"Sorry to disappoint." Leliana quipped, "I'm Leliana, the-"

"Oh, you're 3 PM. Sorry for running into you." he apologized with a lopsided smile.

"3 PM?" she asked.

"I'm terribly with names...and directions...and cooking, but that's besides the point! It's easier to remember a number than a name. Hi, I'm Alistair, pleasure to meet you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this just kinda happened, not really sure whether or not this will go anywhere yet but I had a really fun time writing this. 
> 
> I always appreciate feedback. Hate it? Like it? Did it rain today? Tell me down below!


	2. Rain

 

_Sarah_

 

Sarah let out the breath she hadn't realized she was holding the second the heavy door closed shut behind her newest customer and burried her face in her hands. Leliana, she had to remind herself, her name was Leliana. Well, Leliana probably tought her an idiot, the elf didn't need to speak Orlesian to know that she must've butchered her name to no end. Sighing she made her way back behind the counter, hoping to find something that needed doing and that would stop her from thinking about the redheaded devil that she couldn't for the life of her get out of her head.

Normally, finding something to occupy her thoughts with wasn't hard, managing your own business rarely left you with enough time to stare holes into the air during opening hours. Unfortunately for her, at least so far, today had been one of the slower days, almost sluggishly so. Before Leliana's appointment they only had one client walk into her parlor, a suit of all things, too. 

Suits were a rare sight in this part of town, most of them preferred to stay far enough away from the Alienage that it remained safely out of sight and out of their mind. That's how it worked, wasn't it? It appeared to work for all the people sitting in their comfortable offices on the other end of Denerim, so maybe it did.

Suit hadn't talked much, she had already forgotten his actual name but figured Suit worked well enough. He was an older, bulkier man that looked like he had forgotten how to smile a few years back and was afraid he might just break something in his features if he tried to now. Usually not the type of person you'd expect to find getting a tattoo in a place like this.

Usually she wouldn't complain about silent customers. They would show her whatever design they wanted embedded on their body, show her where they wanted it and they would share any important details with her before the needle pierced their skin. Alistair had insisted they'd install speakers so they could at least play music to fill the room with an upeat tune to keep the silence from becoming to awkward. Of course Suits, while dodging any of Sarah's attempts at polite smalltalk with proficient ease, would demand she turn said music off the moment the needle was only inches away from his skin and she had already prepared everything.

She wondered what kind of music Leliana preferred.

Bad, bad Sarah, get that woman out of your head. Browsing the different playlists they had set up a few months back and had added a few songs here and there she picked one of the cheerier playlists, something to fight the mood of the relentless floods of rain that never ceased their assault on the glass windows around her. Hitting shuffle and fumbling for the remote that controlled the speakers, her mind wandered back to the woman upstairs. Creators, she wished she could just turn that part of her brain off, why couldn't her brain work like a machine? Don't need a process, easy, just close it and be done with it! 

Facing the door just in time for Leliana to return she could feel her breath hitch. Spinning on her heel and trying to look anywhere but in her direction she managed to stop herself from staring. While the Orlesian wasn't dripping all over the floor anymore, her soaked clothes still hugged her curves at all the right places.

Sarah.exe has stopped working. System reboot imminent, for more information please contact our support hotline and keep a minimum distance of 200 meters from any gorgeous readheads you might come across while-

Right. Music. A press of a button later the tattoo parlor was filled with an upbeat melody and the elf could feel some of the tension leave her body. Turning around, and somehow managing to knock over the picture frame resting on the counter, she found just enough self restraint inside her to look the other woman in the eye. Leliana, startled by the sound of the breaking frame, looked past the elf and regarded the the picture with what she could only assume to be curiosity.

"Sorry if I startled you." the redhead apologized immediately, "Your brother?" she asked after a brief moment of hesitation, pointing towards the other figure standing next to Sarah in the picture.

"You could say that, we both grew up in the Alienage and I met Tamlen when we were both still children." the elf explained, she couldn't remember when she had first framed it and placed it were she could see it every day, a reminder that the Alienage wasn't all bad even if that was what people wanted you to believe. 

"Does he still play?" Leliana asked, her gaze fixed on the wooden instrument they held in their arms.

"Yeah, he does." Sarah responds, looking over to Leliana, "How'd you know I didn't?"

That got a smile out of the other woman, "Your hands," she said, covering her mouth to stop herself from laughing, "you're gripping the poor thing like a bear, like you're afraid you could drop it at any moments notice."

"And how do you know so much about violins? You play yourself?" 

"You could say that," she mimicked Sarah's earlier statement, "I teach at Denerim University over on the other end of the city."

"I should clean this up," the artist pointed towards the mess of glass shards that clustered the desk.

"At least let me help you," Leliana offered only to get ushered towards the bag she had dropped off earlier.

"It's fine, really." she assured her , "Did you bring a concept or a sketch for the tattoo you wanted? Otherwise you can choose something from the book on the- Oh, wow." Most people she had worked with would find a tattoo they liked online and bring a picture with them on their phones, sometimes customers would have their designs commisioned from other artists, or, even more rarely they'd draw them themselves. It seemed Leliana was one of the latter ones. "Did you draw this?"

When she didn't answer right away the elf looked back up from the paper, she could have sworn she spotted a blush on the Orlesian's features. "Yeah, didn't really like any other tattoos that went in the direction I wanted so I thought 'Hey, why don't I doodle something myself?" Letting her eyes wander over the 'doodle' again she appreciated it just a little more knowing this detail. It depicted the silhouette of what she assumed to be a nightingale, the empty space inside it filled to the brim with different musical notes she couldn't have deciphered in a million years.

"If this is you doodleing, I'd like to see something you consider a finished product." the elf grinned, "Let's get to work then, shall we?"

 

-

 

She didn't quiet know how much time had passed before she was content with her work, the black bird proudly adorning the space on the right hand side below her belly button. Her agitated self that usually reigned while she worked vanished after the first few strokes with the animated needle, Sarah had been surprised how easy it was to talk to Leliana as long as she had something to occupy herself with and didn't have to think about the fact how smooth her skin was beneath her touch. Guiding Leliana towards one of the almost ceiling high mirrors along the back walls of the room she tried to gauge her reaction.

"It's beautiful." she all but gushed, turning around ever so slightly and studying the ink.

"Glad you think so, I'm-" the sharp sound of a ringing phone cut her off, giving the Orlesian an apologetic look she hurried back behind the counter and answered. 

Putting the phone back in it's place she turned around only to catch Leliana observing her with that unreadable expression of hers, the redhead looked away almost instantly, her attention back on the mirror in front of her.

"That was my next client, changed her mind and cancelled her appointment." the elf mused.

"You sound surprisingly happy for someone that just lost a customer." 

"Talked her out of it, actually. Lot's of teenagers come in here the second they no longer need the permission of their parents, eyes wide and too much money in their hands. Wanting the name of their latest lover, they'll tell you it's their 'soulmate', tattooed somewhere on their body. Most of them will come to regret it in a month or two so I try to talk to them. Some listen, some don't, if they still want the tattoo I try to do something than can be covered up later." Sarah explained.

"That's kind of you, you'd likely make a lot more if you wouldn't do that." the redhead responded, pulling her tank top back down and letting the nightingale vanish beneath the fabric.

"Probably." the elf laughed, "But I don't want these kids waking up one day alone and with a hooker name tattood along their arms."

"Hooker name? You have to explain that one." Leliana giggled. 

"You know, the kind you'd associate with a...certain kind of business. Candy, Goddess, Crystal...oh, yeah, Angel, I had an Angel come in here last week. I was thoroughly disappointed her boyfriend's name wasn't Demon."

"You're terrible." Leliana laughed, her gaze wandering out of the window and her expression falling a little when she noticed that the rain outside had no intention of stopping any time soon.

"You can stay here until it stops raining buckets," Sarah offered, "only if you want, of course. "

"I don't want to be a bother." 

"You're not, promise." the elf tried to assure her, "Come on, I'll make us some coffee."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this was a pain. The computer I usually use to write broke down and is currently being looked at. That, in turn, means that I had to rewrite this chapter from memory on my phone if I wanted to upload anything at all this week. While I'm still not completely happy with how this turned out, I want to update this fic at least once a week and I'm unsure what I'd change about it. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I always appreciate feedback and comments of any kind.
> 
> On a different note, this is the original drawing that inspired not only Leliana's tattoo but this fic as a whole:
> 
>  
> 
> [Click me!](https://myelitedetail.us/clipart/drawn-music-notes-bird_2398148.html)


	3. Smile

 

_Leliana_

   
  
She couldn't get her out of her head.

Leliana had tried, really tried to think about anything else over the past week, engulfing herself in her work as much as possible and having exams and tests prepared for her students she wouldn't need for another year or two by the time it was Tuesday.

And the audacity that that woman possessed! Jumping into her thoughts without warning or hesitation, catching her off guard wherever she was with a fleeting image of a lopsided smile or that adorable furrow in her brow she wore whenever she had to really concentrate on something. That woman would be her Maker damned downfall and she would love every second of it.

"You're doing it again." Josephine's always cheerful voice chimed in somewhere behind her, the sound of all sorts of clothes flying through the room and the ruffling of several drawers being pulled open one after the other an indicator that the Antivan wasn't done packing yet.

"Doing what again?" Leliana asked almost absently, careful not to let herself be distracted as she continued to shape the raven colored lines with another skilled motion of her hand. Ever so slowly the various strokes and almost otherworldly marks began to resemble the image she couldn't get out of her head.

"Smiling." she responded, the 'click' sound of the grey suitcase shutting close filling the room. "You never smile like like that, not since we left Orlais."

"Can we change the topic? I really don't feel like talking about Marjolaine, Josie."

"Of course, how about we discuss why your are sitting here instead of asking out that woman you can't seem to get out of your mind?" her friend mused, slipping into her favorite coat and glancing over Leliana's shoulder. "Or did you just suddenly take an interest in Dalish culture over the last week?"

"I don't-" Leliana tried, another stern look from the Antivan making her sigh in defeat, "I might have been thinking about her. But that doesn't mean anything! She was just being nice, nothing more. We had coffee and made small talk, that was it. It was... nice, fine, really. She is fine."

"Oh, is she now?" Josephine smirked.

"That's not what I meant! I- ugh, don't you have a flight to catch or something?" Leliana groaned.

  
"I do, in fact." she replied sparing a quick glance on her phone to check the time and embracing her friend in a quick hug. "Bye! And don't forget to talk to your crush!" she heard Josephine laugh as she descended the staircase that led in the living room, the sound of the door falling into it's hinges echoing through the empty rooms below.

Letting her head sink she regarded the unfinished sketch below her, the smiling image of the tattoo artist staring back at her. Green, blue... grey? Or was it brown? Why couldn't she remember something so simple like color of her eyes? Whoever once told her that the first thing you will notice about a person is the color of their eyes clearly didn't know what they were talking about.

  
Picking one of the many different colored pencils out of her repertoire she let the wooden instrument hover only millimeters over the paper. The designs that ran across her face were intriguing to say the least. The woven, inky black lines originating from either side of her face intertwining themselves on their apex along her temple were fresh enough in her mind that she could transition them on the paper easy enough. The problem lied with the rest of the design, really, specifically the ink beneath the elf's chin she had next to no memory of besides the fact that she knew it had existed in the first place.

Artistic curiosity. Yes. That's what this was, nothing less and nothing more. A crush? She didn't have crushes anymore, she was twenty-five years old for the Maker's sake. Josie had no idea what she was talking about. Definitely.

She should swing by the Warden tomorrow after work, otherwise she couldn't finish her sketch and it would drive her insane. That was the only reason she wanted to see Sarah again. Of course it was. Why shouldn't it be?

  
  
-

  
  
It took until the late afternoon before Leliana wrapped up everything that needed doing at the University and made her way towards the outskirts of Denerim's Alienage. The hours having ticked away painfully slow and the few classes she had tought that day feeling like they took even longer than they did usually.

She couldn't help the small smile that tucked at the corners her lips once the almost familiar blue, neon lit griffon came into view. Without the raindrops obscuring her view through the glass windows, Leliana could already see inside the empty looking shop from the other side of the busy street.

  
Making her way inside the shop, the sound of the bell hanging above the door ringing once again trough the desolate rooms, she was left waiting for the voice she expected to call out from deeper inside the shop.

  
Pressing the binder she carried a little closer to her chest, having wanted to take some things from work back home, she looked around the deserted area. Studying the empty parlor, she quickly found herself in front of the door that led further inside the nukingtowards the living area upstairs.

Should she knock? Knocking felt like the right thing to do. She wouldn't want someone to just burst into her place and barge around, wouldn't she. Sudden nervousness gripped her and made her fist stop mid air, what was she even doing here? This was stupid, she was being stupid. She should just turn around and-

  
Leliana never got to finish that thought as the door suddenly sprang open right in front of her, causing her to stumble several feet backwards and drop the binder she had carried in her hands. Various papers ranging from yet-to-be-marked exams to a certain sketch she really didn't want the other woman to see now clustered the floor in between them.

  
"Creators, I'm so sorry, I didn't hear you come in and- Leliana? What are you- nevermind, let me help you clean this this up." the elf stammered, joining Leliana on the floor to collect the mess of papers and and notes after a brief moment of dumbfounded staring.

"It's fine, really." she tried to reasure the artist as she picked up stacks of documets and bundled them under her arm. "You don't have to..." Leliana's voice trailed off once her eyes wandered back up and ultimately settled on the tattood woman's features. The dark leather jacket that had hidden the elf's arms during her last visit had been replaced by a sleeveless shirt putting the dark patterns that ran across the lenght of her right arm on full display.

Some symbols she recognized, Leliana was sure some of them were of Dalish origin, others she couldn't place anywhere, perhaps they didn't exist anywhere else. It was also at this point she began to notice that she was...toned, to say the least. She couldn't help but wonder if she worked out. Bad thoughs, stop it! A second later something touched her hand at threw her back into reality.

While she had been busy daydreaming, her mind had been collecting the papers around her subconsciously, looking back down she found her hand on the last on that still lay upside down on the floor. Her hand that grazed against, and was almost covered, by that of Sarah's. Leliana's gaze shot back up only to find emerald green eyes star back into her own blue pair. Green, she would never again forget the color green.

  
Pulling her hand back as quickly as she noticed it Leliana tried to save herself another embarassing moment and swiftly got back on her feet, she desperately hoped that her face only felt like it could light up in flame any second and didn't show it. That hope was shattered once Sarah turned the sketch in her hand and she recognized her own work from the previous evening.

"Wow. Wish I had known I made such a lasting impression." the artist laughed, handing Leliana the paper. From all of the impossible amount of things she expected to hear, Leliana was quiet sure that one hadn't been on the list. "You know, it's a little unfair I never had the chance to draw you, don't you think?"

"Oh? And do you intent to change that?" Leliana breathed, her eyes never leaving those of the elf. Something inside her made her forget her earlier anxiety and instead speak the words as they flooded into her mind. "Maybe over din-"

"Doyoumaybewanttohavedinnerwithme?" Sarah blurted, not giving the redheaded teacher a chance to finish her own queston to ask her the same.

"What?"

"Do you want to have dinner? With me, I mean. Only if you want, of course. You don't have to, I'd understand if you don't-"

"Yes." Leliana cut her off, "Yes, I'd like that. How about Friday?"

"Really? I mean, yes, yes of course. Friday sounds perfect." the tattoo artist responded, a shaky laugh escaping her lips.

"I'm looking forward to it, then." Leliana spoke as she turned around to leave, everything that had happened in the last few minutes slowly catching up to her and giving her a sudden desire to get as much space between herself and this building as possible. Seriously, that woman's heating bill must be insane. 

"Hey! You forgot something!" she heard Sarah yell after her, lifting the sketch of herself in the air and waving it around.

"Keep it!" Leliana respondend as she made her way through the door and relished in the cold autumn air making contact with her skin, she wondered how it long it would take the elf to notice the digits she had hastily scrawled in the bottom right corner just now.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Computer still broken, wrote this chapter on an old laptop probably dating back to the dark ages. Send help.
> 
> Aaanyway, date night next week you guys! :D
> 
> As usual I appreciate feedback, kudos and comments from every one of you to no end - talk to me!


	4. Salt and Strawberries

 

_Sarah_

 

 

“Come on.” the elf groaned, drawing out the last word while desperately trying to keep the uncooperative, onyx mess that was her hair in place behind her head. Her fingers already beginning to hurt from having to rearrange her hair clip for what must be the dozenth time. While the artist wasn’t the most tidy or spruce person you’d ever meet, her hair was, and likely always will be, her weak spot.

With an audibly crack the hair clip sprang from her fingers towards the wall and split into two on the impact. “Fine! You win...hope you feel good about yourself.” Sarah murmured to herself as she picked up the pieces and spared a quick glance over her phone. The blue light and the quick buzz of the device indicating she had received a new message.

_Leliana 19:26 –_

_Red or blue?_

__[Attachment: 1 Image]_ _

Flicking over the screen she could almost feel her eyes growing wider once the image was fully displayed and showed two beautiful, yet modest, dresses neatly arranged on a bed. Her fingers practically flew over the arrangement of keys on the display and her answer was quickly sent.

– _Sarah 19:24_

_Blue, definitely blue._

Smiling she leant against the bathroom wall and scrolled through yesterday’s array of text messages. Having given up any notion to do anything fancy with her hair and instead turning her attention towards more pleasant thoughts.

– _Sarah 15:39_

_You know, It’s been almost a week and you still haven’t told me where you’d want to take me._

_Leliana 15:41 –_

_Oh? Maybe I’ll keep it a secret, you wouldn’t want me to spoil any of the fun, would you now?_  

– _Sarah 15:43_

_I don’t know, it would be nice to know whether I’ll be needing a fine dress or, you know, a parachute._

_Leliana 15:46 –_

_Alright, alright. You know that Orlesian restaurant in Chancellor’s Street with all the flowers in the front? No parachutes involved, promise._  

– _Sarah 15:47_

_La ser? Isn’t that that super fancy place? Pretty sure I could barely afford the parking there let alone dinner._

_Leliana 15:49 –_

_Le Serre, yes. And don’t worry, I invited you after all, didn’t I? It’s on me._

– _Sarah 15:50_

_What?! You can’t be serious! That place must be crazy expensive!_

_Leliana 1_ _5_ _:51_ _–_

 _À_ _cheval donné on ne regarde pas les dents._ _Besides, I happen to know the owner_ _quiet well_ _and_ _still have to repay you for the coffee_ _the other day_ _, no?_

– _Sarah 1_ _5_ _:53_

 _Mythal ma halani,_ _I’_ _m not gonna win this argument, am I?_

 _Leliana 1_ _5_ _:55_ _–_

 _No, no you won’t._  

 _Leliana 1_ _5_ _:56_ _–_

 _Also, my translator is currently dying trying to decipher whatever you wrote in...Dalish?_  

– _Sarah 1_ _5_ _:58_

_Ha! You’re not the only one who can write unintelligible gibberish!_

_Leliana 1_ _5_ _:58_   _–_

 _*Orlesian. How about you tell me yours tomorrow If I tell you mine?_  

– _Sarah 1_ _5_ _:59_

_It’s a date!_

_Leliana 1_ _5_ _:59_   _–_

_I know. ;)_

  
  
Placing her phone back on the edge of the sink the elf looked herself over one last time in the broad bathroom mirror standing before her, running a comb trough her locks she settled for a simpler lock. Seriously, how Hawke managed to do her hair every day was a mystery to her.

The smile on her face only broadened as she tucked at the edges of her jet black blazer and finally felt content with her work. Turning around she all but jumped seeing Alistair leaning against the frame of the doorway next to her  
  
"Who are you and what did you do to the Sarah I know." the blonde haired man asked, giving his best impression of a serious look that crumbled into a wide grin just a second later.  
  
"What? I can't look nice?" Sarah huffed in mock anger, snatching the phone from behind her and burrowing it in the pockets of her jeans.

"I didn't even know you owned nice clothes! All you ever wear around here are old shirts five sizes too big for you and the same pair of sweat pants.  
  
"Hey! They're comfortable, asshole." the elf laughed, faintly punching her friend in the shoulder and making her way toward the living room.  
  
"Alright, alright, have fun, you." she heard him call after her before he switched into his old man voice, "Be home before sundown, and don't drink, you hear me? Else you'll be grounded for the next two weeks!" 

  
"Thanks, dad." Sarah deadpanned as she opened the door that lead toward the staircase, "I'll try not to step on your lawn on my way out."

 

- 

_Leliana_

 

 

 _Blue, definetely blue._ Leliana repeated the words in her mind, smiling as she remembered the tattoo artist’s response to her earlier question and returned the blood red dress to the wardrobe she pulled it out from just a few minutes before. Pressing the blue fabric against the front of her body she looked herself over, the dress Josie had gotten her for her last birthday matched her eyes and still looked as good as the day she had first seen it. Sometimes she felt like it was made just for her, it was perfect.

Getting out of the mismatched combination of casual clothes she had worn for most of the day and throwing them in the general direction of her bed, Leliana quickly slipped into the blue fabric and scanned the room for her lucky charm.

Sometimes she felt silly for still believing in things like luck after all this time, but the silvery necklace had been with her every step of the way and it just felt wrong  if she wouldn’t be wearing it today. After all she had worn it when she had first met Josie, the day she left Orlais and came to Ferelden, and when she got the job at the prestigious University of Denerim. Lifting the necklace out of it’s case she let it dangle from her fingers and took a moment to regard the metallic sword reflecting the incoming light from above in every direction. The blade of mercy, a symbol not only for her beliefs but for the past she left left behind for good three years ago.

With the familiar weight pressing against her chest once again she made her way downstairs towards the garage, only making a quick detour towards the bathroom to make sure everything was the way it should be, her footsteps on the staircase echoing ever so slightly through the empty house with far too much space for one person alone.

Rummaging through the shoe cabinet next to the front door the Orlesian fished out a pair of heels she hadn’t worn in years, that thankfully still fit like they did the day she had bought them, grabbed her keys and made for the garage connected to the rest of the massive building. Turning the keys in the ignition the engine sprang to life and the black Coupé rolled out into the night.

 

-

  _Sarah_

 

 

_19:39_

The elf wrapped her arms around herself as another gust of chilly autumn air brushed against her, the debate whether or not she should go back inside and get her jacket had already been won by her pride, so that was out of the question.

_19:39_

She checked the time on her phone again, the stubborn clock didn’t move and Leliana was still nowhere to be seen. Traffic, she reminder herself, she was probably just stuck in traffic.

_19:39_

Sarah was about to concede and get her creators-damned jacket when a fancy looking car pulled into the driveway that looked just like the one the redhead had described on the phone. Taking a tentative step towards it she could make out a pair of deep, blue eyes watching her from inside the Copé.

“Hey.” she breathed as she threw herself in the passenger seat and closed the door behind her, the warm interior of the car doing wonders to lighten up her dampened mood. The dress Leliana wore did it’s part too, the image hadn’t done it justice.

“Hey yourself.” the Orlesian smiled, smoothly pulling out of the driveway with ease and heading towards what she assumed to be the direction of the Market District. The journey through the night city was filled with easy small talk until they fell into a comfortable silence, Sarah idly watched the passing people and streetlights as they whizzed past them.

The rattling and clinking sounds coming from all around them pulled the elf out of her trance not a minute later, recognizing the uneasy expression on Leliana’s face only strengthened her own anxiousness and before she could ask the question sitting on the tip of her tongue the car gave one last loud, metallic noise before it came to a standstill and the sound of the engine subsided.

“This can’t be happening.” Sarah heard the redhead whisper more to herself than anyone else, letting her head drop onto her hands that hadn’t yet left the steering wheel. Lifting her head once more her gaze was fixed straight ahead and rested the busy streets before her, she turned her attention to Sarah, and again ahead. “It worked fine just this morning.” she sighed as she unbuckled her seat belt and reached for the door.

“Mind if I have a look? I know a thing or two about fixing things.” Sarah asked and reached her own door once she saw the Orlesian nod. As she opened the car’s bonnet, Sarah was met with a cloud of gray smoke coming at her from below, suppressing the cough building up inside her throat she looked around the more or less intact interior of Leliana’s car. “Didn’t you say someone took a look at this?” she asked.

“Just last week.” Leliana confirmed, raising an eyebrow as she saw the elf dial a number into her phone, “What are you doing?”

“Calling someone that can take care of...this.” Sarah gestured towards the car, “Preferably without...duct tape.” she added, reaching inside the bonnet and pulling out a piece of gray tape that held something in place until now.

“Hey, Sten? It’s Sarah, I need a favor.”

 

-

 

“This is a disgrace.” the giant Qunari stated and pointed towards the Copé, having just finished inspecting the car after it had been fetched and brought to his repair shop. His cold gaze fixed on, and never leaving, Leliana. The elf could have sworn the redhead just shrunk a few centimeters.

“Can you fix it?” Sarah asked, directing the mechanics attention towards her.

“It’s not like you to ask idiotic questions, Kadan. Of course I can fix it.” Sten grumbled, turning around and facing the Copé again. “Come by tomorrow, the repairs won’t take long. Now leave me, I have much to do.”

“Thanks, big guy.” the artist replied over her shoulder while walking towards the exit, taking Leliana’s hand and practically dragging her back outside.

“I’m sorry.” the Orlesian sighed the second they both were out of the door, “This wasn’t supposed to happen and…,” she checked the time on her phone, “we missed our reservation in the restaurant, great. I’ve officially ruined everything.”

“That place would’ve been way too snazzy for me anyways, I wouldn’t even have known what spoon to use, imagine all the looks of disdain from the other guests!” the elf grinned and Leliana let out a soft chuckle, “You didn’t ruin anything. I’ve got an idea, come on!” she added and took the other woman’s hand again as they made their way back towards the Grey Warden.

“Catch!” Sarah warned once they arrived inside the Warden's garage, throwing one of the motorcycle helmets in Leliana’s direction and tucking the other one under her arm.

“Where are we going?” the Orlesian asked, putting her helmet on and looking the sleek, green and metallic black tinted motorcycle over one more time.

“And spoil the fun? You’ll see when we get there.” she smiled, putting on her own helmet and starting the engine, “Now hold on tight!”

 

-

 

“I’m fairly certain we were the snazziest people they’ve ever seen in that drive through.” Leliana laughed, pulling another fry out of the bag resting on her lap and stuffing it in her mouth after dipping it in her milkshake.

“Oh yeah, definitely, that cashier did a double take after seeing- what in Mythal’s name are you doing?” the elf’s tone changed into that of utter shock mid sentence.

“What? Don’t tell me you’ve never tried fries with milkshake?” Leliana asked and Sarah only shook her head. “You have to try it.” the Orlesian insisted, extending another milkshake soaked fry towards the artist.

“If that kills me, please come up with something more badass to write on my headstone, will you?” she murmured before taking a tentative bite, “Alright, maybe you’re not as crazy as I thought.” she added after a moment of hesitation. Her gaze wandered back towards the view they were presented with from their vantage point above the metropolis, one hand subconsciously snaking it’s way behind their bench and brushing against the fabric covering Leliana’s back.

“Thank you,” the redhead said finally, “for saving today, I mean. This was supposed to go down a lot differently.” Leliana added with a soft laugh.

“That's what I’m here for, saving the day and all that.” Sarah smiled, “And if you’re dead set on that date, maybe we could move that to next week?”

“I’d like that.” Leliana replied without hesitation, “But there’s something I need to do first, something I’ve wanted to do for a while now.”

“And what would that b-” she never even heard her close the distance between them. Leliana’s lips tasted of salt and strawberries, a taste that very rapidly became her absolute favorite. Sarah always wondered why people said that time stopped when you kissed someone, because in reality time only seemed to flow faster and before you can think about it you’re apart again.

“I’ll let you know I don’t kiss on the first date.” Sarah breathed, one hand still on Leliana’s side and never letting go.

“Good, I don't either.” the Orlesian declared, anything else she might’ve said forgotten as her lips had much more important things to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mythal ma halani = Mythal help me (I somewhat Frankenstein'd that one together, 'ma halani' basically means as much as 'help me')
> 
> À cheval donné on ne regarde pas les dents = don't look a gift horse in the mouth (My French is super rusty, however I'm fairly certain that one's correct.)
> 
> Anyway, thoughts? Criticism? Things you'd like to see in this fic? Put them down below!
> 
> As usual I appreciate feedback, kudos and comments from every one of you to no end - talk to me!


	5. Pictures

 

_Sarah_

  

 

56, 57, 58, 59...60. Yep, none of the many tiles on the Warden’s floor were missing, not that that would stop her from counting again, just to be sure. Sarah’s mind drifted off once she got to twenty-five, her gaze wandering outside the broad windows and scanning the crowds of people outside. Giving the odd dressed strangers that would occasionally walk past her store silly nicknames in her head had long become boring and, as it turned out, cheating at chess was a lot less fun when you had to play against yourself, repeatedly.

Alistair’s days off from work at their tattoo parlor had always been dreadfully boring, and today didn’t seem to be an exception of that rule. The elf moved another piece on the chessboard and let out a frustrated huff. Idly flicking through the pages of the calendar that hadn’t been moved from it’s spot on the registry in months, Sarah was somehow still disappointed that her next client’s appointment hadn’t magically moved a few hours forward. Today was going to be a very, very long day indeed.

Just as she was about to head upstairs, curl herself into a ball on the couch and rewatch all eight seasons of Dr House for what must have been the dozenth time, she heard the bell above the door ring through the room and had to contain her excitement as she spun around on her heel. While the person stepping inside her shop was no client, she definitely didn’t mind the redheaded surprise standing in the doorway.

“Hey,” Leliana chimed as she made her way through the shop and eyed the chessboard with a smile that tucked at corners of her lipstick tinted lips, “hope I didn’t interrupt your game.”

“Nah, ‘was loosing anyway. Got a feeling the other guy was cheating, though.” the artist chuckled as she made her way around the counter and quickly embraced the other woman, careful not to crush the camera dangling from Leliana’s neck, “Thought you’d be busy with work today?” She hoped she hadn’t sounded accusative, but they hadn’t seen each other since their derailed date last Friday and Sarah couldn’t mask her disappointment of not having been able to spent much time with the Orlesian since then.

“Don’t even get me started,” she murmured, “Josie’s still in Antiva and I took over most of her classes for the time being, hence the camera.” Leliana added, pointing at the device that looked way too expensive to just dangle around in front of her. “Turns out one of her classes is photography. Not that I’m complaining, taking a few pictures in the park is a lot less stressful than the other parts of the job.”

“Wanna head upstairs? I’ll make us some coffee and you can show me the pictures you took.” Sarah suggested and Leliana seemed only to happy to oblige, making their way up the circular staircase, she could feel the Orlesian stop in her tracks once they arrived in the living room. “Something wrong?”

“Where do you live?” she asked after a few long moments in which her eyes darted around the room, after she saw the elf raise an eyebrow she added, “This is were you sleep and eat, I get that. But not where you live, right? Empty walls, no pictures or framed paintings, this doesn’t seem like...like you.”

Looking around the room she conceded to Leliana’s point, “You frame things you like to remember, right? Well, growing up in the Alienage you won’t come across all that many things you’d want to remember.” the elf explained, raising a hand to stop Leliana from uttering what she already assumed to be an apology, “But you’re right, I don’t ‘live’ here. Come, I’ll show you something.”

Leading the Orlesian up another staircase they ascended higher and soon stood on the roof overlooking most of the surrounding buildings. She watched the other woman attentively, following her gaze as it wandered over the streets below them before settling on the pair of chairs on a large patch of green located near the roof’s edge. Taking Leliana’s hand in her own she led her towards the redwood chairs, watching as she placed her camera on the small table inbetween them and sank into the chair.

“I like coming up here after a long day...or when I just have to think about something. It’s calming seeing everything from above, problems suddenly become small, sometimes they even become manageable once you see them in the right perspective.”

“I’ve never seen Denerim from above,” Leliana replied, her gaze lost somewhere between the buildings and skyscrapers on the horizon, “it’s beautiful- What are you doing?”

Snatching the camera from the table, Sarah quickly jumped backwards, making sure Leliana couldn’t quiet reach it. “Making new memories. I think it’s about time I did that.” she smirked as the first bright flash threatened to blind the redhead. It quickly turned out to be the first of many as they began their struggle for the device, Leliana joining the elf’s laughter only a short while after as they tumbled down towards the grass at their feet.

Laying on their backs on the soft green she felt the other woman’s smile widen as she pressed her lips to hers and another flash of bright light filled the air around them.

“You know that camera is supposed to be for work?” Leliana breathed eventually, observing the differently shaped clouds high above them.

“Oh? I think I’m working very hard on trying to brighten your day.” Sarah grinned, letting out a squeal as the Orlesian poked her side.

“You’re impossible!” Leliana exclaimed, bursting out with another set of laughter once Sarah’s fingers found their marks on the Orlesian’s stomach, relentlessly attacking the other woman until she dissolved into a fit of giggles. “Stop! Stop, I surrender!” she breathed, fruitlessly trying to defend against the elf’s assault.

They stayed like that for a while, watching the clouds above them pass by and pointing out peculiar shapes now and again. “That one looks like a Nug!” Leliana exclaimed, maybe just a little too excited, and, after not receiving and answer for some time, added. “Hey, something wrong?”

Sarah shook her head, trying to push the thoughts that had crept up on her and which she really didn’t want to deal with right now towards the back of her mind. “No, no...just got distracted, sorry.” the elf tried to reassure her, “I wanted to thank you, actually.”

“Thank me? For what?” Leliana asked.

“For noticing, earlier I mean.“ She explained, “It’s been a while since I’ve taken anyone up here and..it’s been nice, really nice.”

“How about we stay here just a little longer?” Leliana suggested after a brief moment of silence, interlacing her fingers with that of the artist’s while never letting her gaze leave the sky above them.

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter's a little shorter this week than I would've liked, been sick for most of it and still don't really feel like doing anything but sleeping and drinking tea. x.x
> 
> Anyway, you're not here to listen to my whining! As always comments and kudos are highly appreciated.


	6. Trick and Treat

_Leliana_

 

 

They were at a Halloween party held by one of Sarah’s friends she hadn’t met yet, it worried Leliana just a little that she still didn’t know if 'no one important, he’s just Kirkwall’s new Viscount' had been a joke or not. She decided to ask her again later as she found herself squeezing past a tipsy Templar getting handsy with a woman in rather convincing Seeker armor fighting off a furious blush on her face.

Leliana could feel her grip around the brightly colored drinks in her hands she went out to get grow a little tighter once she noticed that Sarah wasn’t alone anymore.

If anyone were to ask her, Leliana would describe herself as a rather collected, level headed person. It was for that very reason, and not for the few drinks she might or might not have had that evening, that when she turned around and spotted some guy sitting in  _her_ chair and far too close to  _her_   ~~friend~~   ~~girlfriend~~  date - yes, that’s the word she was looking for, of course it was - who hadn’t been there a minute ago, she decided the situation demanded a rather collected, level headed approach.

She didn’t remember making her way through the room, but when the boy, a tall, muscular elf with piercing blue eyes and washed out vallaslin, said something that made Sarah laugh and put an arm on her shoulder she didn’t care either. Putting the glasses on the counter next to her and tapping Sarah lightly on the shoulder she hardly waited for the woman in the lavish green Keeper robes to turn around before lunging forward and pressing a hard kiss to her lips.

Breaking apart, for the need for breath more than anything, she ignored Sarah’s flustered expression and smilingly glanced towards the seat she now expected to be empty only for the same blue eyes to smile back at her with a mixture of curiosity and amusement. Leliana was about to say something when he beat her to it, his attention no longer set on Leliana and instead settled back on her girlfriend.

“You never introduce me to your friends anymore, Felassan, you do know that’s awfully rude, right?” the man asked, the mock hurt in his voice only betrayed by the smile that never left his face, “But please do continue, I’ll take some pictures for you.”

Sarah, after having taken a few moments to recompose herself, glanced at each of the two for a second before finding her voice, “I don’t- You-  _ugh_. Tamlen, that’s Leliana. Leliana, meet my idiot brother Tamlen.”

“Oh,” Leliana thought out loud, her mind already bounds and leaps away and the image of a picture frame on the second floor of the Warden suddenly causing the color of her cheeks to turn interesting shades of red, “I… I have heard so much about you.” she tried to save as much of what little face she had still left.

“Really? ‘Cause this is the first time I hear anything about you.” he said, throwing a look filled with accusation towards Sarah.

“Maybe I would if you stopped sleeping with them.” the artist deadpanned.

“That was one time!” the other elf tried to defend himself while doing his best not to laugh, “And you really going to blame me for that? You know it takes two to tango, right?” shooting a quick glance towards Leliana and smirking into his glass he added, “Of course you do. And will you stop looking at me like that, sis? It’s very rare that I get to see you all flustered like this and I intend to take as much advantage of it as-”

A loud crash followed by several curses, some in languages she couldn’t understand, coming from one of the rooms towards the back of the estate cut of anything else he might have wanted to say and instead made him jump on his feet, “Aaand that’s my sign. Twas nice meeting you Leliana, Felassan.”

“Hey doc, you do know that most people come to parties like these to stop working once in a while?”

“You knew I weren’t most people eighteen years ago and look were we ended up.” he chuckled before vanishing into the crowd.

 

–

 

“You know, you’re kinda cute when you get all jealous.” the elf smirked, wrapping her arms around herself to shield against the cold while they waited for their uber to pick them up.

“I don’t get jealous-”

“Of course you don’t, and you also totally didn’t think my brother was hitting on me, right?” Sarah interjected.

“Would you let me finish? I don’t get jealous, at least...at least not until now.” Leliana explained, fingers playing absently with a Sovereign in her pocket and her gaze fixed thoroughly on the ground. This wasn’t supposed to happen, why was this happening so soon?

“Aww, you saying I’m special?”

“I’m regretting having said anything.” Leliana sighed, her eyes flashing up in mischief a moment later as she added, “Felassan.”

“We’re not talking about this.” the elf stated.

“Oh but I’d really like to talk about that,  _Felassan_. It’s cute, really.” Leliana teased

“Ass.”

“Well yes, your ass is also cu-” a soft pressure on her lips made every other thought suddenly evaporate, feeling her own body stiffen she tried to relax and instead lean into the kiss. “You’re playing dirty.” Leliana breathed after a moment that didn’t last long enough.

“What’s the fun in playing if you’re not allowed to cheat? It’s good to know I can yet surprise you.”

She was glad for the pair of bright headlights that turned into their street as it stopped her from saying something she didn’t know she was ready to share just yet. She’d have to talk about it eventually, a pesky voice in her head reminded her, and she would, just not today, today was about something different than all the things she wasn’t yet able to admit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, okay, so this was supposed to go up on Halloween, then on the following weekend...and well, here we are almost two weeks later. Turns out life getting in the way of things and being plagued by an idea about something else that I wanted to write make for a bad mix.
> 
> Anyway, let's get back on track with a functioning upload schedule, shall we?
> 
>  
> 
> (Also, about the other thing I wrote instead of this chapter, if you played Divinity: Original Sin 2 you might want to check out [this](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16502381))


	7. Classes

_Leliana_

 

 

Breath.  
  
In... and out. In... and out.  
  
The human mind was a silly thing, really. You could do, practice and even excel at something a thousand times and your heart would still race and your mind would still drift off towards the darkest of places that moment you eventually stood in front of the _door_. The _door_ being anything you’d want it to be, from that moment you pick up the phone when you’re expecting that important call, when you finally gathered enough courage to talk to that special someone in college or it might just be something as trivial as ordering takeout from your favorite fast food place. Everyone has their own special doors.

In Leliana’s case, at least today, the door seemed a lot less metaphorical and instead appeared a lot more physical. Leliana’s door today was blue, for all doors in the art wing of Denerim University were tinted the same shade of blue. Staring at the shiny, silvery handle attached to it she swore that she could hear it taunt her to just get it over with already. Looking back up she surveyed the frame on last time, it was clustered from top to bottom with an equally colorful and chaotic arrangement of portraits and drawings some of which, in her opinion, would easily rival those of some well known artists out there. Josephine could’ve spray painted ‘My Classroom’ all over the cobalt colored metal and it would have been less obvious than this to anyone passing by.

One would think that, at some point during the three years that Leliana had spent working and teaching at the University, she would’ve gotten that feeling of impending dread out of her stomach every time she had to introduce herself to a group of new faces. But that’s the thing with doors, no matter how many times you stand before your door, sometimes you still much rather not open it at all.

Sometimes reminding herself that things could be worse helped a little. While she really didn’t want to think about the years spent in Orlais, thinking back at her first years in Denerim made the present look just a little brighter. Leliana still remembers her first days at the University perfectly, the confusing layout that caused her to get lost every other period, the monstrous amount of names that were expected of her to memorize and the vast amount of people that had mistaken her for a student, sometimes multiple times a week.

At least people no longer did that, most of the time anyway.

Taking another deep breath she twisted the door handle and pushed open the door, a little more ready to face whatever lay behind it than she had been a moment ago.

Even the familiar smell of dried in paint and the mishmash collection of brushes that clustered the teacher’s desk and clung to the air inside the room, a sensation Leliana had come to appreciate ever since she had been a child, couldn’t ease her nerves. The same nerves that went haywire the second she had made her way through the room and looked into twenty-something faces staring back at her.

“Hello there,” she began, having pieced together her introduction a few days ago while on the phone with Josie and silently praying that what the Antivan had told her would work.

“General Kenobi!” one of the students towards the back exclaimed only a split second of hesitation later, causing most of the room to erupt into laughter, Leliana couldn’t keep the grin off her face. She’d have to remember baking Josie a cake before she would pick her up from the airport.

“You are a bold one!” she chuckled, struggling not to laugh at her own stupid reference. After a few moments, in which most people managed to collect themselves, she decided to continue, “Okay, okay… so as you all might know I’m Ms. Leroux, I’ll be your substitute teacher until Jos- Ms. Montilyet returns from her trip to Antiva.

Sinking into the chair next to her she let out a breath, a smile still tucking at the edges of her lips as she connected her camera to the laptop already set up on the desk. Maybe this whole substitute thing wouldn’t be so bad after all.

  
Her opinion changed dramatically once she reached what must have been around the middle of the presentation she had prepared, a presentation containing all the pictures she took on her camera. The same camera she had received from Josie for her twenty-second birthday and she had only ever used for work related matters ever since then. Until last week, to be precise. She had been so nervous she’d all but forgotten about the images from the Warden the other day that she had completely forgotten to put them on a different hard drive. Maker, she was doomed.

All but throwing herself at the device, skipping over any material depicting herself and Sarah in it. Leliana didn’t dare look up from the laptop for the remainder of the presentation, if she wasn’t going to die from embarrassment alone she was sure her face would eventually burst into flame.

When the dreaded moment finally arrived, the array of photographs she had taken over the last weeks coming to an end, Leliana reluctantly got up from her chair and readied herself to face the music once more.

“Alright, if any of you have questions I- oh, wow.” she couldn’t hide her astonished reaction as roughly ten hands practically shot into the air, settling for a girl in the far right corner Leliana eventually pointed in her direction.

“So, was that your girlfriend?” the girl asked, maybe a little too excited.

“I… I don’t-” Leliana, at a loss of words for once, helplessly pointed to a guy at the other corner, hoping that whatever he had to in mind would set her back on track.

“I..uh, wanted to ask the same thing, actually.” he replied a bit sheepishly.

“Not like you’d have a chance with someone like her.” a girl sitting next to him chuckled.

“Yeah, sorry bro but she’s waaay outta your league.” the boy on his other side commented, putting a hand on his shoulder and shaking his head.

Leliana, having found her voice again, watched the whole thing with curious bewilderment that did nothing to stop her embarrassment, “Are there any class related questions? If I hear another thing about my social life we’re going to write a test about Brother Genitivi’s combined works next week.” she stated, having had enough for today. Luckily for her, and her mental state, there were still some hands left she could choose from. At least her day couldn’t get any weirder.

 

–

 

Debating whether or not to take the concrete steps leading towards the campus two at a time, not wanting to spend a second longer than necessary in the University building today, the feeling of her camera dangling from her neck and rhythmically hammering against her chest seemed to be the only thing that kept her grounded and from sprinting through the front door. Maybe her dignity did that too, but she wasn’t too sure she had any of that left after today.

Her mood changed dramatically for the second time today the second she stepped into the crisp air outside and surveyed the parking area that unfolded itself in front of her. In the parking lot stood an elf wrapped in a thick jacket scanning the surrounding area, their eyes meeting only when Leliana almost ran the other woman over making her way towards her.

“Hey.” Leliana greeted, wondering when her voice had began sounding as cheerful as it did.

“Hey,” the artist replied, “Was pretty worried I had parked in front of the wrong building for a while there.”

“What are you doing here, anyway?”

“What? I can’t be nice and pick up my favorite teacher from work?” the elf smirked, pressing a helmet into Leliana’s hands.

“Too bad, it appears you just missed Madame De Fer, looks like you’ll have to put up with me instead.” Leliana grinned.

“You’re terrible,” Sarah laughed, taking the red head by surprise as she closed the distance between them and pressed a quick kiss to her lips, “You’re lucky I like you.”

Whatever Leliana might’ve replied was quickly forgotten as she heard the same girl from her class earlier across the parking lot, “I told you they were together! You so owe me twenty bucks!”

“What was that about?” Sarah asked, her head tilted and one eyebrow slightly lifted.

“I’ll tell you later, let’s say over dinner? I’m starving.” Leliana suggested, clinging to the other woman as the engine beneath them sprang to life and they took off towards downtown. She wasn’t entirely sure what to make of today, but one thing she knew. Some doors were worth opening even if it was just to see what lay behind the next one.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this chapter turned out a lot different than what I had originally in mind. But I'm 99% sure the end result came out on top.
> 
> By the by, the whole introduction bit was literally how my english professor in college introduced himself, haven't had a teacher that broke the ice as fast as he did ever since then. Although I'm fairly certain that one guy in that class who hadn't seen Star Wars at that point was thoroughly confused. (Seriously, watch Star Wars if you haven't already.)


	8. Hawke's

 

_Leliana_

 

 

“And you thought that the best way to introduce yourself to twenty new faces was...with a Star Wars reference?” Sarah teased as they made their way through the mostly empty streets of late afternoon Denerim. The sun slowly setting above the horizon somewhere behind the pair and casting the Metropolis in different shades of red and orange.

“It sounds stupid when you say it like that.” Leliana conceded, burying her already frozen hands a little deeper into the blissfully warm pockets of her coat just as another gust of icy late autumn win hit them. “But in my defense, it worked. Well, kind of, anyway.”

“And if no one would’ve gotten the reference?” the elf asked, “Would you have awkwardly stood there for a few moments before ultimately giving up?”

“Maybe? Wouldn’t be the worst first meeting I had with someone, introductions aren’t exactly my strong suit, you know?” she admitted, only now noticing the arm that was snaked through her own as they crossed another street, to say that she didn’t mind would have been an understatement.

“Oh? I’d say you dripping all over the floor and looking like you’d murder anyone that dared looking you in the eye was rather charming as far as first impressions go.”

“What can I say? I’m just a simple woman trying to make my way in the universe.”

“I hate you. So much.” Sarah groaned, shaking her head but smiling despite her words.

“No you don’t.” Leliana quipped, “Where are we going anyway? I haven’t been to this part of town in ages.”

“There’s cozy little place in the area, the food there’s amazing, you’ll love it!” the elf replied with a lot more enthusiasm than Leliana would’ve expected someone to talk about a place where they go to get their food.

Leliana used the time they spent walking in companionable silence to look around. Luckily for them most people were still at work and the streets weren’t nearly as crowded as they’ll soon be, she loved Denerim will all her heart but sometimes there were simply too many people for her liking. Taking in the houses and shops around her she wasn’t entirely sure were they ended up. Somewhere close to the Market District, likely, she figured eventually.

It didn’t take too long before they came to an abrupt halt before a little diner positioned at the corner of one of the busier streets. Looking up she could make out the brightly lid red letters above the door that simply read _Hawke’s_. Opening the transparent doors Leliana relished in the warm air that slowly but surely began to unfreeze her features, as it turned out Autumn very much still sucked.

Following Sarah through the diner that, like the streets outside, thankfully wasn’t all that crowded, they eventually ended up behind a giant of a Qunari occupying one of the many booth’s that clustered the interior. “You’re in my spot.” Sarah declared, tapping the giant on the shoulder. Leliana did a double take, but decided against saying anything just yet.

“You know what they say, first come first serve. Early birds catch worms and all that shit.” the Qunari replied, nursing his coffee and otherwise paying no attention to them.

“I’ll let you know that I know the diner’s owner.” she continued in the same emotionless voice, seemingly unbothered be the lack of attention she was getting from the guy. Taking another long sip from the coffee and setting the empty mug back on the table. Sliding out of the booth and standing up he towered over the elf, it looked like neither of them had any intention of losing the unspoken staring contest between them.

It only took a moment before the giant began to roar with laughter and another second for the elf to join him, “Good to see you, people were beginning to think you might’ve died.” he chuckled with the slightest bit of seriousness in his voice, clasping the elf on the back hard enough to make her lose her footing he looked over at Leliana just a moment longer than necessary and added, “Make sure she doesn’t vanish into oblivion after today again. She has a tendency to do that.”

“Thanks, Bull.” Sarah huffed after regaining her balance, “Do me a favor and find Hawke for me?” Nodding the Qunari turned around wordlessly and vanished deeper inside the diner, they slid inside the booth when they heard him laugh from the other room. “Hey, Krem! You’ll never guess which asshole rose from the dead!”

“You do have a curious ragbag of friend, don’t you?” Leliana asked, letting her eyes trail out of the window next to them.

“That’s one way to put it.” she chuckled, “Bull is… well, he’s Bull. He has a thing for redheads, take it as a compliment.”

Idly flipping through the menu, the view outside the window of the nearby park distracting her more often than not, she understood why Sarah liked this booth. It didn’t take long for a woman to emerge from the direction that Bull left and head straight for them.

“Hell, if it isn’t my favorite elf. What brings you to my humble little place?” the dark haired woman asked, sparing a curious glance at Leliana before returning her attention to the artist.

“Careful, Hawke, you don’t want Merrill to hear you say that, that might just be the one thing that’ll get her to finally snap.” Sarah joked.

“I don’t think she has the ability to become angry.” Hawke replied, “If she ever does I don’t want to be there, you know, just in case. Anyway, what can I get you two?”

“Two page 5 specials.” Sarah replied seemingly without sparing a second thought about it.

“Coming right up.” Hawke smiled, turning around she headed to the kitchen, “Hey, Anders! Stop bickering with the broody elf, we got work to do!”

She skimmed through the menu another two times before looking back up again, “There is no page 5 on the menu.” Leliana finally said, giving the other woman a curious look.

“I know.” Sarah replied, leaning back into the cushions, “It’s something we came up with when Hawke opened this place, basically it’s whatever they have plus a little...extra magic from the cook, you’ll see.”

“Mysterious, are we?”

“Yep. You can tell me about that girl in the parking lot winning that bet while we wait, that sounded like a rather interesting story.” the artist grinned, listening attentively as Leliana recounted the story of how, to Sarah’s great amusement, there might be some people crushing on the elf in Josephine’s class.

Time practically flew by, and after what seemed like only a moment, two steaming plates were placed on their table, perplexed she stared at the contents of her own plate for a few seconds. “No way, how did you…?”

“I might’ve called ahead and asked for something fancy and…. well, Orlesian.” Sarah replied a bit sheepish.

“I can’t remember the last time I had something like this, it must’ve been back in Orlais. I- thank you, it’s one of my favorites, actually.” Leliana gushed, looking over the delicate arrangement on her plate she wouldn’t have thought to see outside Orlesian borders.

“You can’t say that before you tried it, come on, dig in!”

“We should come here more often.” the redhead declared after the first few mouthfuls had vanished from her plate. Looking back she came she realized that, just now, she felt closer to home than she did in a very long time. Perhaps in more ways than just the food, too.


	9. Remembrance

  
Sarah

  
It was a week later when she found herself in front of Leliana's door, her bike parked a few meters away she couldn't stop fidgeting with the silvery keys in her hand. Keys that weren't hers, too. To be perfectly honest she hadn't even seen these keys before today.  
  
But they were Leliana's spare keys, that much she knew. The words engraved on the metal was the first thing she noticed after she had found them lying around the Warden earlier. She must have accidentally dropped them when she came by the other day.  
  
Night had claimed the world around her for quiet some time and she could barely make out the silhouette of the building before her.  Noticing the light coming out of one of the many windows of the house she decided to ring the doorbell first. House almost seemed like the wrong word, she thought while she waiting, even in the dim light of surrounding street light the building seemed enormous.  
  
The thought of Leliana growing medicinal plants in her basement to cover the cost made her flash a quick smile in the darkness. Even thought the other woman hadn't responded to any of her calls today, just opening the door to leave the keys felt wrong. So she decided to wait. Minutes passed and neither sound nor movement came out of the house. Sarah decided to test a theory.  
  
Looking through the list of contacts on her phone she quickly found the one she was looking for and called the number. It didn't take half a second before a familiar ringtone could be heard all the way from the brightly lit room above her. What she didn't expect was the distinctive sound of glass shattering to accompany the otherwise soothing melody.  
  
Something was wrong and she no longer had the patience to wait for a response any longer. She quickly turned the key inside the lock and opened the door into a dark corridor. Still unable to make out any sound beside the ringtone of Leliana's phone she tried to navigate through the pitch black room looking for some kind of light switch.  
  
Stumbling towards what she assumed to be a staircase, and knocking over at least two rather heavy objects on her way there, Sarah made her way towards the second floor and the lone, dim source of light coming from upstairs.  
  
To say that she had been unprepared for what she found in that room would have been an understatement. Sitting on a small table in the center of what turned out to be a kitchen sat a very quiet, similarly small Leliana staring into the nothingness of the otherwise lifeless room.

“Leli?” Sarah asked hesitantly, taking a tentative step inside the silent room. Doing her best to ignore the massive blood-red pool, that continued to grow and soak itself into the white carpet floor beneath it, and the countless tiny shards of glass splintered around it she placed a hand on the other woman’s shoulder.

“You broke my wine bottle.” she answered after a long moment that threatened to stretch into eternity, her voice shaky and giving enough indication that the elf knew that the bottle hadn’t been full when it collided with the floor. Her eyes never left the spot on the opposite wall where a wide window offered a small glimpse of the pitch black scenery outside.

“You’re drunk?” it was less of a question and more of an observation. Trying to tear her attention away from ghastly white knuckles that only seemed to clutch tighter around the half-full wine glass Sarah instead glanced over Leliana’s face. Her normally flawless make up was smudged and blurred in a way only one thing could do.

“That’s the point of drinking, no?” Leliana replied, idly swirling the wine in her glass in circles and watching the bright red liquid move in circles. "Do you remember anything about your parents?" she asked eventually, giving no indication she even noticed the hand on her shoulder and never letting go of the goblet in her hand.  
  
"Not much. They died in a car crash when I was a kid. Ran away after that, didn't want anyone to tell me what to do or how to feel. I was a stupid kid." Sarah answered, feeling like she, too, needed some amount of alcohol for this conversation. "There is something I'll always remember, it's stupid really."  
  
"Can't be that stupid if you still remember it." Leliana retorted.  
  
"I remember a lullaby my mom used to sing for me when I was a baby. I can't remember her voice, I couldn't have told you how she looked if I didn't have a picture of her. But that song, there wasn't a moment in my life in which I didn't remember that bloody song." Sarah said, and after a moment in which she took the glass out of Leliana's hand and placed it on the kitchen table she added. "You never talked about your parents, are they- I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked." a flash of sadness in the redhead's eyes made her abandon her question.  
  
"No...no its fine. It's only fair I tell you." she said, her words sounding a little clearer than before. "I never knew my dad and my mom died before I had a chance to know her. The only thing I really remember about her is the smell of her perfume. Andraste's Grace, I couldn't imagine using anything else after all this time. Maybe it's easier this way, can't grief someone you didn't really know, right?" reaching for the goblet her hand froze in the air. "After that I grew up with my foster mother in Orlais, I shouldn't complain, really... she was loving, caring, I got everything I could have hoped for and more." she trailed of after that, her fingertips barely grazed the goblet's frame before she withdrew her hand like the glass bit her finger. "It's funny, really, you never really think about people until their gone. Because then you'll start wondering. You sit there and wonder if you told them enough times that you loved them, you sit there and wonder if they resented you for that one stupid thing you did or said. And you know what the worst part is? You never stop wondering. Even after they've been dead for over twelve years you’ll never stop wondering."  
  
Trying to stand, and supporting herself with one hand on the table, she got as far as one step before she all but toppled over and was caught up in the arms of her visitor. "How about you get some sleep? We can talk tomorrow when you're less likely to fall on your face.", Sarah suggested with a small smile that didn't quiet reach her ears. She tried not to think too much as she ushered Leliana towards the door that lead into the next room.  
  
Reluctantly accepting her help, Leliana let herself be lead outside the kitchen. "You're so warm. How are you always so warm?"  
  
"And you're a chatty drunk. Come on, let's find your bedroom." Sarah replied, finding the room soon after and, while looking got the light switch, seriously, it's like Leliana made a habit of hiding them, fell head first onto the mattress.  
  
Lying awake on the soft fabric and staring at the ceiling Sarah's not quiet sure how exactly she managed to navigate them through the dark rooms and into Leliana's bedroom, somehow the comfortable weight on top of her made thinking difficult. Leliana had fallen asleep only minutes after they stumbled sideways into the king sized bed. Even half asleep she had hummed a quiet melody that sparked something inside the elf.  
  
What had begun as a hum to accompany Leliana's had quickly grown into familiar words and verses she hadn't heard herself sing in quiet some time. She felt a little lighter after the last words of the lullaby had left her lips and the room was once again completely silent safe for the sound of even breathing against her ear.  
  
If she would get up to leave now she would risk waking Leliana, and that, she decided quickly, was simply too much of a risk.

  
-  
  
Leliana

  
  
She awoke with a groan, a pounding headache pressing against her temple threatening to split her skull into pieces and an unfamiliar stiffen in her neck. It was only now that she came to realize two things. First of all, she was lying sideways in her bed, a pillow stuffed under her head and wrapped in a blanket. She didn't sleep like that. She figured it tied in with the second thing, the simple fact that she didn't remember much of last night besides the fact that she had been drinking and- maker preserve her.  
  
"Shit, shit, shit." she cursed under her breath, scrambling out of her bed and, thankfully still fully clothed, made for the door. Rushing towards the staircase and running a hand through her hair she needed to figure out where she had left her phone. Maybe if she called her right away she could still salvage some things, explain a few other things while she was at it.  
  
The sound of plates and glasses clinking together coming from the kitchen almost made her jump.  
  
"Morning, sleepyhead." she heard a voice she hadn't expected call out from the next room.  
  
"Morning?" Leliana responded hesitantly, debating whether or not she was still asleep. Making her way inside the kitchen it became very apparent she still dreamt. It wasn't even the simple fact that the broken mess of glass on the floor was gone, or the missing spot of red liquid on the floor. No. There, with her back toward her and busying herself at the kitchen counter, stood Sarah, preparing breakfast like it was the most normal thing in the world. "You... you stayed?"  
  
"Uhm, yeah. You kinda fell asleep on top of me and I didn't wanna wake you." ah responded turning around and rubbing her neck. "Sorry if I overstepped some boundary, wasn't sure if-"  
  
"Thank you." Leliana cut her short, "For staying and, well, everything else, really." the words died in her throat. Suddenly the floor seemed really interesting.  
  
"Hey, look at me. What's wrong?" Sarah asked.  
  
"What happened yesterday, what you saw, shouldn't have happened. This, all of this, shouldn't be your problem, you have your own things to worry about." Leliana tried to explain, "You shouldn't have to listen to me going on about how sad my life is when yours wasn't exactly peachy. That side of me was pathetic and you shouldn't have to see that, I'm sorry."  
  
"Can we stop doing that? The whole 'I'm sorry' thing?" she replied, "Look, I didn't stay because I pitied you, or because I felt like it was expected of me or some other excuse. I stayed because I care about you, a lot. Even the drunk, sappy side of you that talks about how warm I am and humms in her sleep." she smiled.  
  
She didn't knew if she could've said anything if she wanted to but it didn't matter, not really, anyway. She didn't waste a second and closed the distance between them, tightly embracing the elf and not feeling like letting go any time soon.  
  
"Now." Sarah tried after a few moments, "After we all agree not to be sorry anymore, how would you like your eggs?"  
  
"Hm, how about omelet with pepper, a few croutons and some tablespoons red caviar? Maybe throw some crushed walnuts in for flavor? Leliana asked, it felt good to laugh again after yesterday.  
  
"Scrambled. Gotcha."

  
  
-

Sarah

 

She didn't think she ever saw Leliana wear black before. It doesn't suit her, she decided. Maybe it's because she's not used seeing her in the dark color, she chose not to dwell too much on it.  
  
It was cold on the cemetery, it felt even colder than the rest of town, as cliché as that may sound. Her left hand was buried in her jacket's pocket, her left was interlaced with that of her girlfriend. She made a habit of gently squeezing it once in a while, as a reminder if nothing else.  
  
It felt weird being back here. She hadn't been to the place in a few years, she stopped going after she opened the Warden together with Alistair. In a way if felt right, too, like she was supposed be here.  
  
They went to the graves of her parents first, she wondered who tended to the Mahariels headstones, she hadn't in quite some time. Maybe she should come here more often again.  
  
Neither of them said anything as they stood there, each of them using the other's presence to keep them grounded.  
  
Sarah felt the grip around her hand tighten once Oisine's grave came into view, Leliana had told her that even tho she grew up in Orlais, her mother wished to be buried in Ferelden where she was born.  
  
She didn't know for how long they stood there, but when the first flakes of radiant ice crystals slowly descended from high above and covered the space around them below a blanket of brilliant white, she didn't really care. As long as she wasn't alone, she really didn't care.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This week's chapter is a little longer and got a few more feels in it, thought about splitting this up into two but felt like this way made more sense.
> 
> As always, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and if you did I'd appreciate if you left kudos or a comment. :)
> 
> Also, if you're curious about what lullaby Sarah is talking about, it is [Mir Da'len Somniar](https://irenezhong.bandcamp.com/track/mir-dalen-somniar).


	10. feelings and other outlandish notions

 

_Leliana_

  
Considering the icy cold wind that howled outside the window just a few steps away, the woman on the other end of the screen sporting an elegant, short cut dress seemed almost surreal. Even with poor video quality and the image of her best friend freezing every now and again, Leliana found herself daydreaming about summer, summer in Antiva to be precise.  
  
"Anyway, that's how that happened and- hey, you paying attention? Thedas to Leliana?" Josephine asked.  
  
"Sorry, spaced out." Leliana apologized, hugging her blanket just a little tighter to stop herself from shivering against the cold. "Got any idea yet when you'll be back in Denerim?"  
  
The Antivan's expression visible darkened at that, the dark rings under her eyes that reminded Leliana of their time studying in Orlais now more prominent then ever. "Honestly? I'm not sure. My father, he's not getting better. The doctors are at a loss and so am I."  
  
"Josie, if there's anything I can do, you'll let me know, right?" Leliana asked.  
  
"Stop worrying about me, will you? You're doing more than enough covering for me as much as you do." Josephine tried to brush her off, "And enough about that. How's your girlfriend?" she smiled.  
  
"She's not my- fine, she's doing fine."  
  
"You know, there are people out there that say it's unhealthy to keep on lying to yourself, right? One day you might wake up and believe all the things you try to tell yourself." Josephine replied, it took a moment before realization set it, "You're afraid."  
  
Leliana didn't look at the screen of her computer for a long time, at least that's what it felt like to her. "Yes." she said finally, "Maybe I am. It just... it just feels so much more real when someone says it out loud, you know? Because if I don't say it out loud, I can pretend. Pretend like it doesn't mean as much as it does, pretend it's just something temporal, something fleeting."  
  
"So what's your plan? Pretend like you don't feel anything until that's what she believes too? Until you make yourself believe it?" the Antivan challenged her.  
  
"I don't know, alright? I don't know. What if I do? What if I prefer that over repeating what happened in Orlais? What does that make me?" Leliana asked, neither having the energy nor caring that her friend could likely hear every ounce of desperation in her voice.  
  
"Human." Josephine said simply, "But eventually you’ll have to make a decision. Either you’ll stick to your pride or you talk to her, and I mean _you_. Not the person you invented when you fled to Ferelden and not the woman that does her best to do push everything good that happens to her away from herself. I’m talking about _you_.”

“I don’t know if I can.” Leliana answered truthfully, “And even if I do, it’s not the only thing I’m worried about.”

“You can’t still be- it’s been years, Leli.” Josephine gave her a stern look that lasted until her lips curled up in a mischievous smile, “Besides, you were never worried about your scars when we began to… share our little hobby.”

“That was different and you know it.” Leliana sighed, “We were friends long before we started sleeping together, I had known you for years, even before everything went to shit. It worked because we knew what we were getting into, we were friends, and just friends, after all – this time it’s all uncertainty and doubt. What if...”

“ _What if_ what?” Josephine asked.

“What if she wants something whole? Something that isn’t broken? She shouldn’t have to pick up my pieces.”

“Would you stop beating yourself up over something that happened years ago? Spoiler alert – there’s nobody out there that isn’t at least a little bit broken in their very own way. You’re worried you’ll make a mistake putting your trust in someone? Well guess what’s worse than knowing you made a mistake.”  
  
"Knowing you never even tried at all? When did you turn into a walking, talking fortune cookie and how did I miss _that_?" Leliana asked and the joke fell flat in the tension that surrounded them even while they were hundreds of kilometers apart.

“You can deflect as much as you want, you’ll still have to talk to her eventually. She deserves that much, don’t you think?”

“I hate it when you’re right, you know that?” Leliana conceded.

-

Even hours later the wind hadn’t quieted down one bits. At some point during the last hours she had moved onto her favorite armchair in living room and busied herself watching the heavy snowflakes dance outside the windows. There was a book in her lap, at least she was fairly certain that she had, at some point today, tried to read a book – a notion she had given up on only a few pages in when her mind kept wandering off.

And like she couldn’t keep her mind where she wanted it, neither could she control her eyes that eventually landed on one of the paintings that adorned the room. Familiar strokes of paint that had made an inky black bird come to live and drift through a cloudless sky surrounded by white petaled flowers.

A part of her still wondered why she had kept it. Not exactly why she wanted to save this specific one, but why she had kept one at all when she had left everything else behind. Leliana knew she would have to explain why she was familiar with every stroke of paint on the canvas or how a painting that, to all accounts of the rest of the world, was currently kept safe in one of Orlais most famous museums, came to hang in her living room. But like many things, that was a conversation for another day. A day she wasn’t looking forward to one bit.


	11. Past is Prologue

 

_Sarah_

 

“Royal Flush.” the elf grinned over the table, wasting no time and collecting her prize from the table. The small tower of chocolate chips had switched sides more times than she bothered to count, but her last round of bluffs had paid off.

“No way – you’re cheating!” Alistair accused her, watching the pile move out of his reach with bitter, and slightly drunk, attentiveness.

“You hurt me, Ali. I have honor, too, you know?” Sarah said, emptying another bottle and carefully placing it atop the pyramid of glass next to the poker table. Their little monument almost reached the table in size and, so far, had only threatened to topple over once! “Maybe I’ll even share some of my honorably earned bounty with you, if you get me another beer.”

“I’m like seventy-four percent sure there’s another box downstairs.” he replied, after another moment, in which he most likely weighted his options against one another, he begrudgingly left his chair. “Hey, Zev, you coming? I’m not carrying that thing up the stairs alone.”

“Hm? Did you say something about free drinks? Lead the way!” the Antivan, who until then had studied the cards still lying on the table with a critical eye, sprang to his feet with newfound vigor and followed Alistair towards the staircase.

Sarah was about to unwrap the first piece of chocolate when she felt something poke against her arm. The Ace of Diamonds, the same Ace of Diamonds already on the table. “You’re getting sloppy, sis. The last time I had to pick your cards from the floor we were kids.” Tamlen said, “Pretty sure Zev would be onto you if he weren’t too drunk to count cards.”

She took the card and pushed it back into her sleeve to the rest, “See? I knew there was a reason I invited you!”

“Mhm. You’re lucky I take bribes to keep quiet.” he chuckled, taking his cut and triumphantly stacking them out of reach. Tamlen was about to add something when the phone lying next to the mount of chocolate sprang to life.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Sarah asked, her eyes darting from the text message back to her brother watching her with an amused expression on his face.

“It’s her, isn’t it?” he asked, “Your eyes do that little sparkly thing every time you get a message from her.”

“I don’t- my eyes don’t sparkle!”

“Yes they do. They sparkle like bloody Christmas lights, it’s adorable, really.”

“Aaand you just lost your driver and get to take a taxi home. Hope it was worth it.”

“Definitely, you’re blushing again.”

 

_Leliana 23:16 -_

_Hey, you free tomorrow?_

_\- Sarah 23:18_

_Yeah, sure. Got anything planned?_

_Leliana 23:19 -_

_Not yet… maybe you can make good on that promise you made me when you asked me out?_

-

She didn’t quiet knew how to feel the next day, ringing the almost familiar doorbell attached to an almost familiar door, armed with pen and sketchbook she carried in the bag slung around her shoulder. As it turned out it was a little easier to navigate through the house without having to worry about hitting your foot against something hard in the darkness.

Leliana led her past the kitchen, up the stairs and into a room she had only briefly glanced into the one time she’d been to her place. It was only with daylight flooding the room that she recognized a key part of the furniture.

“Hey, that’s a Nightingale isn’t it? Haven’t seen a piece from her in years.” she let her hand trace the lines on the painting, if she didn’t know any better she could’ve sworn that it was the original she’d only ever seen through the internet.

“That’s...actually why I wanted you come over. I- Oh, wow this is harder than I thought. Let’s start at the beginning, right? First of all, that’s… that’s the original  _Andraste’s Grace_ you’re looking at.”

Sarah’s hand shot back from the canvas, her eyes flickering from the painting back to Leliana and then back towards the wall.

“I know that because...well, because I’m the Nightingale.”

-

“So… let me get this straight.” the tattoo artist said, letting herself sink a little deeper into the armchair’s cushions. “Before you came to Ferelden you were the Nightingale.  _The_ Nightingale that’s world famous for her works and whose paintings sold for a few million sovereigns a piece?”

“Yes.”

“And you left Orlais after this Marcelain woman-”

“Marjolaine.”

“Marjolaine, yes. So anyway, after she introduced you to the right people and helped you get into the industry...she tried to pull of one of the biggest robberies in recent history. And she made it look like you were behind it all?”

Leliana nodded, “I wanted to believe her, wanted to believe that what she told me was truth. I wanted to believe that she- well, that doesn’t matter anymore. She used me to get to the people she needed to pull it off, and discarded me the second she didn’t need me anymore.”

“And when that failed she tried to kill you to prevent you from testifying.” Sarah repeated what she had heard not long ago like it was the most normal thing in the world, “You survived the car accident, Marj- whatever her name was, that bitch went behind bars and you and Josephine went to Ferelden for a fresh start.”

“That… sums it up pretty well, I suppose. Look, I get it if you don’t believe me – I’m not sure I’d believe me if someone told me that- what are you doing?”

“Doing what I came here for.” Sarah replied, fishing a pen and her trademark sketchbook out of the leather bag on the armrest.

“You- there’s something else you should know – or rather, see.” Leliana said, getting up from her position on the couch opposite from the elf and lifting her shirt. The tattoo on her stomach vanished as she turned around and was replaced by numerous scars tracing along her back. “There was only so much the people at the hospital could do after they hit my car pretty hard and I-” she stopped talking once she felt a delicate finger trace one of the lines marking her skin.

“You’re beautiful.”

“What?”

“You heard me.” Something leather-bound hit the wooden floor while Leliana was pushed back onto the couch. The shirt that was little more than irritation at this point soon followed suit and anything else was forgotten once there was nothing keeping them apart. “So beautiful.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey...I'm not dead! 
> 
> Sorry for the irregular updates right now, with Christmas and all the New Year stuff around the corner I didn't really find time for this fic. (You can blame the friend who thought getting me Tales from the Borderlands and expecting me to do anything else before devouring that game was a good idea.)
> 
> Anyway, hope you guys had a wonderful Christmas and New Years Eve and are ready to show 2019 who's boss!


	12. Future Together

 

_Sarah_

 

To say Sarah felt out of place would have been an understatement. They paused briefly at the reception desk, it gave her her enough time to risk another quick glance at the alien environment surrounding them. She felt like she fell feet-first into a fairy tale. The room she found herself in glimmered – no, _beamed_ in a way she could only image the fabled halls of Halamshiral might’ve during the height of the Orlesian Empire.

Countless, crystal-shaped lanterns adorned the expensive looking tapestry that clung to the walls all around, the clinking of wine glasses and the idle chatter of much more important people than herself filled the air. Sleek tables were arranged along the walls, the thin walls that separated them giving the patrons an illusion of privacy. Sarah’s eyes involuntarily wandered toward the mirror next to the reception, she drew in a breath.

She didn’t belong in this world, in this fairy tale. Her shoes might, her dress definitely did. But she, she didn't. The emerald green fabric hugged her frame perfectly. When she had first seen it the day before Sarah had been more than a little skeptic, but all skepticism melted away the second the velvet enveloped her the first time. She couldn’t get a straight answer out of Leliana when she had asked her about the price of the whole ordeal, if she had to guess she’d say her entire wardrobe wouldn’t have been enough to pay the tailor let alone the dress.

Leliana must’ve picked up on her mood, because as the host guided them toward their table she took one of Sarah’s hands in her own and gave it a reassuring squeeze and stepped closer to her. “Hey, something wrong?”

“I don’t belong here.” Sarah said just loud enough for Leliana to hear her. It was the truth, she grew up a street rat. The only way she ever thought to eat the food they serve in a place like this would be through the dumpsters in a back alley. Sarah felt hard stares trying to burn a hole through her back. She didn’t need to look around to know she wasn’t the only one that knew she wasn’t supposed to be here.

If Leliana had heard her at all she didn’t respond, arriving at their table in one of the restaurants corners Sarah was pleased to note that it offered a little more privacy than the more central tables. Chairs were replaced with a leathery sofa that snaked itself along the edge. Sarah’s attention was lost in the menu, eyes trailing over the uncanny amount of food (half of which she’d likely mispronounce), until she felt the fabric of Leliana’s red dress graze her leg. She looked up from the menu only to see Leliana guide her eyes toward the room, toward a woman at the entrance to be precise.

Sarah could hear Leliana suppress a laugh next to her before she even realized what she was on about. Making her way through the restaurant was a woman with heels that must’ve been more than twice the height of Leliana’s. The poor woman couldn’t go two steps before she had to cling to some chair or her partner that (tried) to walk next to her. Sarah covered her mouth with one hand to stiffen her own laugh as the man’s face tinted more interesting shades of crimson with every passing second. Next she noticed a waiter caught up in a heated argument with a man, his suit looking as expensive as her own dress, were it not for the soup dripping from the black fabric. Somehow it made her feel a little better about herself.

“You belong here. None of these people are perfect, otherwise they wouldn’t try so hard to look like they are.” Leliana said, scooping closer to her on the sofa and putting one hand on her thigh. “If anyone deserves to sit on this table, it’s you.” Sarah had to keep herself from blurting out another laugh for an entirely different reason.

“Yeah, sure, tell that to the _high society_ staring daggers at me.” Sarah huffed, trying not to look anyone in the eye. She wasn’t entirely sure that they wouldn’t devour her soul.

“I’m serious.” Leliana insisted, “You grew up on the street, fine. But did you ever give up? Did you ever stop going forward? You came from so little and created so much.” Sarah could feel a familiar heat spread from her neck all the way to her cheeks, she wondered just how much of it was covered by the dim lighting in the room. “You’re the most amazing person I know, but you need to stop selling yourself short.”

There was a moment of silence, her eyes never leaving those of Leliana. Sarah pushed the heart stuck in her throat back down and spoke. “You’re right.” her hand found it’s way toward Leliana’s cheek, her mouth forming a quiet ‘o’ before she smiled again. “I don’t care who’s watching, this isn’t about them – it’s about us.” The space between them vanished as they melted against each other, everything faded into nothingness. Everything but the soft lips against her own and the soft fabric against her hands. The, rather uncomfortable, waiter at their table cleared her throat and threw them back into reality.

-

The food had been surprisingly good, and not only because it didn’t taste like rich people and money like she had expected it to. They had settled into a comfortable silence while they ate, Leliana took another sip from her wine as if not sure how to break the quiet.

“So...I wanted to ask you something.” Leliana said, a certain nervousness accompanying her words that reminded her of their first meeting, something that already seemed so long ago. “Josie’s going to stay in Antiva for the foreseeable future, which leaves little old me all alone in the estate and I thought that maybe...” she trailed off, as if unsure how to continue.

“Leli, are you asking me to move in with you?” Sarah asked, a smile on her lips that threatened to spread into an all out grin. Not yet, she didn’t want to show all off her cards.

“I- you’re the only person besides Josie that knows about my past, I trust you, and I remember how you said that you didn’t consider your apartment your home, and if you don’t want to drive to work there’s a really good bus connection to the- why are you smiling like that?” Leliana asked, emptying her wine glass after the hailstorm of confessions came to an end.

“You’re adorable when you’re flustered.” Sarah said, not able to hold her grin any longer.

“Is that a yes?”

“Of course that’s a yes, you dork.” the words had barely left her mouth before she felt herself drawn in for another searing kiss. Again the world around them disappeared, but everything else felt different. Maybe different was the wrong word, there was something that hadn’t been there before, something hungry, something new and exciting. When they broke apart Sarah was the first to speak. “Ready to head home?”

“Yeah, let’s go home.”

Home. The word clung to her very being even as they left the restaurant behind, something new, something exciting. She felt as if a new chapter of her life had just begun, a chapter she was glad she wouldn’t face alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, here we are, at the end of this little journey. I just wanted to thank everyone that took the time to read this mess, that left kudos and comments and that stuck with me through this ride. Anyone still here from the very beginning?
> 
> One of the reasons that I wanted to conclude this story is that I currently don't have a lot of time for writing (and I didn't feel like drawing updates out even more) - however, as soon as things start to settle a bit I'm going to start working on a different story, namely what I tried to set up with [A Pinch of Ash.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16068101/chapters/37517687)
> 
> So stay tuned if you're looking forward to that, and stay safe.


End file.
